Confessions of a professional military dependent
Having spent my life as a military dependent (Air Force brat then Army wife and an Air Force grand-brat for good measure), the military life is pretty much all I know.
1. Every single BX and PX smell the same. It’s that Anthony’s Pizza and Robin Hood Sandwiches.
2. Commissaries aren’t as cool as adults. I used to think that a trip to the commissary was awesome (largely because my mom always let us get donuts), now not so much. Especially within two days of payday.
3. Getting my ID at age 10 was a glorious stepping stone in life. It was more exciting than getting my license (I rode the bus everyday to school and didn’t have a car).
4. When we got married, the DEERS clerk just switched me from being a dependent of my father to being a dependent of my husband. No new paperwork needed.
5. You might bitch about moving, but deep down you love it. You yearn for it. You get really bored living in the same place for too long.
6. You will develop a love-hate relationship for the various branches of service. You respect everyone for their service, but you still have favorites. My personal ranking: the Air Force is first, then the Army, then the Navy. Let’s be honest, the Marines are still part of the Navy. No, I do not root for Army during the Army-Navy game. I hope both teams lose. #AIRFORCEFORLIFE #I’MATERRIBLEARMYWIFE #NOTREALLY
7. Only over-achievers learn all the ranks in order with correct insignia. I am not an over-achiever. Though I’ve spent the vast majority of my 25+ years around the military, I still cannot keep the enlisted ranks straight. The officer ranks are the same in the Army and Air Force. Enlisted aren’t, and it’s super confusing. It’s okay if you don’t know them, either.
8. Your conversations with fellow military folk sound like pure gibberish to civilians due to the large number of acronyms. If it can be abbreviated, it will be abbrevied. You waiting to see your new LES after a PCS to see how much the new BAH will be? Translation: each military base / post has a set allowance for living off of the base / post (since there’s never enough housing). So you’re waiting for that new housing allowance (BAH) to show up on your pay stub (LES) after you move (PCS).
9. You get genuinely jealous when you go to a new post or base and see how nice it is. I thought the new PX on Bragg was great until I saw the new one at Belvoir. And then I went to the Navy Exchange over at Walter Reed. The NEX sells Vineyard Vines and Brooks Brothers. WHAT.
What are you milspo confessions?
